Finally

We have waited three quarters of our marriage for Phoebe.  Cassidy has waited over half of her life.  Maclean has waited his entire life.  We have learned and endured a level of patience that we never thought we could.  We never thought we would have to.  We are now thankful for the wait.  Without it we would have never had those wonderful years with just the three of us.  Our little family had a lot of fun!  We would never have had Maclean, the most amazing little boy in all of the world, who brings an immeasurable amount of joy to our whole family.  We would never have been connected with Phoebe…this particular little girl was meant for us.  Not a baby born 6, 5, 4 years ago, but this beautiful little girl.

I am thankful for all of the families that I have connected with during the past 6 years.  Families that all began their adoptions in 2006, hoping to have their babies home within the year.  We had no idea at the time that China was going to significantly increase the wait.  It just kept getting longer and longer as the months, then years, went by.  We have all waited 6 years together and watching them receive photos and news of their new babies when we did was almost as exciting as it was when we were notified of our baby.

We are most grateful for our families and friends who have waited along with us and supported us along the way.  My mother and grandmother especially, who have been there every single day for me.

We received our referral on December 20, 2011 at 5:26pm.  We knew earlier that day that we, along with all of the families that had begun their adoptions on August 10, 2006, would be receiving photos of the child that China had matched them with.  I heard the email alert on my phone, ran up the stairs, and we all gathered in front of the computer to open the email.  We quickly read her Chinese name and her birthdate, June 23, 2011.  She was not even 6 months old.  When we opened the attached pictures and saw her, we knew this was our child.  There she was.  It could never have been anyone else.

She had a little bald head and was layered in many, many quilted pieces of clothing.  The Chinese do not allow their children to ever feel the cold.  She was dressed in red and blue with boots and sat in a wicker chair outdoors.  Her photo was taken when she was only 3 months old.  Her first name “Li” meant “beautiful” and she was.  In early March we sent her a care package with clothing, toys, a soft photo book of her new family, and a disposable camera so we would have more pictures of her first year.  We included warm hats and mittens and blankets for other babies and some gifts for the nannies.  In return we were sent her 6 month photos.  Her hair had grown longer and she was gorgeous.  I connected with another woman who adopted a baby from Phoebe’s orphanage and she had a couple of photos of her baby next to Phoebe at about 5 months old and sent me those. 

After waiting 6 years to finally see our baby, we still had a lot of waiting to go.  It takes a long time to bring an immigrant orphan out of China and into the United States and a lot of paperwork.  Now the wait to travel to get her began.  Patience again.  Torturous.  Agonizing.  Thinking of her growing so far away was difficult, but as we learned more of her orphanage, we knew she was being cared for, loved and was healthy.  We filled out one form after another and finally we were waiting for Travel Approval from China, inviting us to come and meet our baby.  Those 20 days were the longest, most difficult wait of this whole process.   We luckily had a ton of other people on Facebook groups that were waiting with us or had just received their Travel Approvals, so the wait was not a lonely one. 

Finally we have received our dates of travel.  Matt and I have decided that I should go alone and he should stay behind with Cassidy and Maclean, with my mother as backup help.  I am so sad to go without him, to meet her without him, to bond with her without him, but we have an entire lifetime with her.  The more we planned, the lonelier the trip began to look.  I would need and want another person with me.  Everyone who knows me can instantly guess.  Of course I am taking Micki.  She has been through every second of this adoption journey with us.  She was there as the idea of adopting from China was being formed.  She has listened to me cry, worry, stress, give up and start again these past 6 years.  She has wanted Phoebe almost as much as us.  Matt is always calling me “Lucy” and I am taking my “Ethel”.

So, off we go!!  We leave for China on May 10 and arrive in Beijing 15 hours later.  We will spend a couple days there, sightseeing.  We will then head south to Phoebe’s province, Jiangxi, to the city of Nanchang.  She will be placed in my arms and I will hold my daughter for the first time on MOTHER'S DAY!!!!!!  After spending a week with many appointments and getting to know this little 10 month old baby, we will head further south to Guangzhou, for an appointment with the American Consulate to obtain Phoebe’s visa to come to America.  We will spend a few days there, enjoying the warm weather and sightseeing.  We will then travel to Shanghai and fly home from there.

We invite you to follow along with us as we embark on the journey of a lifetime and travel to the other side of the world to meet this beautiful child who was destined to be ours.